This is a tough situation, and it’s understandable why you feel betrayed. Your husband’s actions—using joint savings without your consent—show a lack of respect for your partnership, especially when it comes to major financial decisions.
It seems like the core issue isn’t just about school but about fairness and boundaries. You made a choice for your child, and he made a choice for his—except he did it without discussing it with you first. That kind of financial secrecy can seriously damage trust in a marriage.
Now, the question is: how do you move forward? Do you feel this is something you can work through with honest communication, or is it a deeper issue about how you and your husband view financial responsibility and family dynamics?